18 October 2006

The World's Biggest Blog

I missed it and with it my oppportunity to go inside the time capsule and impress future generations, if there are any.

Here's what would have gone in.

Rose late, for me (8 o'clock), because I'd been up for a couple of hours in the night. Occasionally I find I wake up and can't get back to sleep. So, rather than toss and turn, I get up and read, watch TV, listen to Radio 5. Last night I watched the latest Sopranos, the one where Lauren Baccall and Ben Kingsley make guest appearances. Notable for hearing Baccall yell 'Fuck off' to a couple of muggers. Ooh, Betty! I was going to say that Bogie would never have approved, but then he was the man who have always a store of 'FU' cash, money he had in case he ever needed to tell a movie producer to fuck off.

The radio was banging on about Muslims and their soddding veils.

Up at 8 and considered washing my hair. Decided not to. Decided to have breakfast (home-made yoghurt and apple), but forgot after I was distracted by 24 hour news banging on about Muslims and their sodding veils.

Started a blog about the re-make of the Dam Busters. Will finish it later. Worked a little on a short story I'm hoping to sell to a woman's magazine. Read a story from My Weekly to keep in the mood and realised I'm going to have to tone down the sex and cynicism a little.

11 am, went to the pub in Lincoln. No-one there I wanted to talk to, so kept my head down and started to read Berne's Games people play. It seems to use a lot of technical terms and spurious analysis merely to state the bleeding obvious. Read the local paper and read a letter praising General Dannatt. Roughed out a reply calling on the PM to sack him instantly.

The pub was full of pensioners, invalidity benefit claimants and unemployed taking a break from work. Plus a variety of other scrotes. I noticed one in particular. Young bloke, tattoos and earring, putting down his girlfriend, calling her foul names. Loud-mouthed thug and sanctimonious with it. Why do these characters always say, 'Excuse me', before launching into some ignorant tirade. Of course, she just laughed it all off. Pathetic. So desperate to believe somebody loves her, so terrified of being alone. I truly wished I was young enough, strong enough and aggresssive enough to flatten him.

The pub TV was showing the news about you know what.

Home again and watched Oh, Brother, Where art thou? again. Love it. Remembered to eat my breakfast as an hors d'oeuvre for my dinner of home-made cottage pie (with amendments). E-mailed my letter about the general.

Had to go back to the pub in the evening to do more research for whatever reason I might dream up in the future. Also needed to help my friend finish The Times crossword. Also they were showing Manchester United play Copenhagen and Copenhagen needed some support. We Vikings must stick together.

In bed to listen to The World Tonight. A mention of Muslims and their bloody veils. The latest is Muslims and their sodding faith schools. Should they be obliged to admit 25% 'non-believers'? Who the hell would want to go? At least a little light relief when the Church of England said it was happy to let 25% of non-believers to its schools. Since when did the C of E actually have any beliefs at all?


A man is only complete when he marries. Then he's finished.

from The Sopranos

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